Identifying with Father David -David depicts the depths of a father’s grief at the loss of a son. Whatever the circumstances, whatever the strains on the relationship, every parent can identify with the pain of having one’s own child die first. Many know and recognize the cry of David’s loss without understanding any of the complexities of the relationship between David and Absalom. David’s poignant statement that he would willingly have died in Absalom’s place has become particularly emblematic of parental willingness to sacrifice one’s own welfare to preserve the life of one’s child. Those who know something of Absalom’s rebellion find this story particularly relevant to parents of children who take self-destructive paths from which parental love, though willing to sacrifice, cannot save them. The power of this portrait of parental grief gives this moment in David’s story a familiarity and emotional identification that function apart from the complexities of the story in 12 Samuel. [1]

Co-Conspirators - David’s grief speaks to us not simply of parental loss but of his recognition that his own sins, Absalom’s sins, and God’s justice have all helped to bring this tragic moment to pass. We recognize in David’s grief our own grief over many losses we have experienced not simply as victims but as perpetrators . . . One can hope that it will also remind us that time can run out. There are stories in which the prodigal son does not come home and the waiting father’s embrace is empty. [2]

This story is like a Shakespearean tragedy-intrigue, betrayal, death, grief. Do you know an Absalom story? A child bent on self-destructive behavior on one hand and parents who want to save their daughter or son from that destruction?

How would you balance your roles of father/care-giver and commander of troops trying to squelch an uprising as David did? How would you have done, reasoned, or acted differently?

What irony do you see in Absalom getting hung in the end (cf. 14:25-26)?

Please see the sermon for this week on DPS based on this text.

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[1] The New Interpreter’s Bible II (Nashville: Abingdon Press, 1998), page 1340.
[2] Ibid, page 1342.